A FATHER'S
INSTRUCTIONS FOR LIFE

Years ago, I read that it was the responsibility of parents not to pave the road for their children, but to provide a road map. So, as my son, Adam, prepared to leave for college, I jotted down a few words of counsel and put them in a dime-store binder. After his mother and I had helped him move into his dorm, I presented him with the bound pages.

A few days later, Adam called me. "Dad," he said, "the book is one of the best gifts I've ever received. I'm going to add to it and someday give it to my son." Every once in a while life hands you a moment so precious, so overwhelming, that you almost glow. I had just experienced one.

Here are the words I gave him:

• Compliment three people each day.

• Watch a sunrise at least once a year.

• Over tip breakfast waitresses.

• Look people in the eye.

• Say "Thank You" a lot.

• Say "Please" a lot.

• Live beneath your means.

• Buy whatever kids are selling on card tables in their front yards.

• Treat everyone you meet as you want to be treated.

• Donate two pints of blood every year.

• Make new friends but cherish the old ones.

• Keep secrets.

• Don't waste time learning the "tricks of the trade." Instead, learn the trade.

• Admit your mistakes.

• Be brave. Even if you're not, pretend to be. No one can tell the difference.

• Choose a charity in your community and support it generously with your time and money.

• Read the Bill of Rights.

• Use credit cards only for convenience, never for credit.

• Never cheat.

• Give yourself a year and read the Bible cover to cover.

• Learn to listen. Opportunity sometimes knocks very softly.

• Never deprive someone of hope; it might be all he or she has.

• Pray not for things, but for wisdom and courage.

• Never take action when you're angry.

• Have good posture. Enter a room with purpose and confidence.

• Don't discuss business in elevators. You never know who may overhear you.

• Never pay for work before it is completed.

• Be willing to lose a battle in order to win the war.

• Don't gossip.

• Beware of the person who has nothing to lose.

• When facing a difficult task, act as though it is impossible to fail. If you're going after Moby Dick, take along the tartar sauce.

• Don't spread yourself too thin. Learn to say no politely and quickly.

• Don't expect life to be fair.

• Never underestimate the power of forgiveness.

• Instead of using the word problem, try substituting the word opportunity.

• Never walk out on a quarrel with your wife.

• Regarding furniture and clothes: if you think you'll be using them five years or longer, buy the best you can afford.

• Be bold and courageous. When you look back on your life, you'll regret the things you didn't do more than the ones you did.

• Forget committees. New, noble, world-changing ideas always come from one person working alone.

• Street musicians are a treasure. Stop for a moment and listen; then leave a small donation.

• When faced with a serious health problem, get at least three medical opinions.

• Wage war against littering.

• After encountering inferior service, food or products, bring it to the attention of the person in charge. Good managers will appreciate knowing.

• Don't procrastinate. Do what needs doing when it needs to be done.

• Get your priorities straight. No one ever said on his deathbed, "Gee, if I'd only spent more time at the office."

• Don't be afraid to say "I don't know."

• Don't be afraid to say "I'm sorry."

• Make a list of 25 things you want to experience before you die. Carry it in your wallet and refer to it often.

• Call your mother.