SIGNS OF THE TIMES
A Small Paper With Small Articles Because It's Just Plain Small
Volume 1, Number 28
Truth...
Number 2
Compiled By:
JD Hoeye
- A foot in the door is worth two on the desk.
- The best way to hear money jingle in your pocket is to shake a leg.
- People who do a good day's work seldom have to worry about a good night's sleep.
- Cheerfulness is contagious, but don't wait to catch it from others. Be a carrier!
- Ideas not put into practice are merely dreams.
- Nature gave us tow ends - one to sit on and the other to think with. Our success or failure depends on which we use the most.
- A farmer, plowing with one mule, kept crying out, "Giddyup, Gene; giddyup, Tyler; giddyup, Jim; giddyup, Lonnie; giddyup, Danny."
A man passing by asked him, "How many names does that mule have, anyway?"
"Only one," the farmer pointed out. "His name's Darrell, but he don't know his own strength. So, I put blinders on him, yell a lot of names, and he thinks a half-dozen other mules are helping him.
- It used to be a fool and his money were soon parted. How it happens to everybody.
- Most of us get what we deserve, but only the successful will admit it.
- Some people are like fences; they run around a lot without getting anywhere.
- Most people are willing to meet each other halfway; trouble is, most people are pretty poor judges of distance.
- The best way to be somebody is just to be yourself.
- The ambition of many dieters is to weighed and found wanting.
- You are never alone when accompanied by noble thoughts.
- Luck is nothing but good planning properly executed.
- The trouble with teaching a child the value of a dollar is that you have to do it almost every week.
- The only workout some people get is jumping to conclusions, running down their friends, side-stepping their responsibilities and pushing their luck.
- Good advice is no better than poor advice, unless you follow it.
- Today's might oak is just yesterdays nut that held its ground.
- People who are always walking on clouds leave too many things up in the air.
- The preacher came along and wrote on the signboard: "I pray for all."
The lawyer wrote: "I plead for all."
The doctor wrote: "I prescribe for all.
The plain citizen wrote: "* pay for
- A little girl watched her mother carefully measure out six glasses from a bottle of cola labeled, "One calorie per bottle."
The child peered for a long time at each glass and then said, "I wonder which one got the calorie."
- If you feel you have a score to settle, make it zero to zero and start over again.
- A state trooper stopped a woman doing 62 miles-per-hour in a 35 mile-per-hour zone. "I was just obeying the signs I saw that 62," she explain. The trooper informed her that was the highway mile marker.
"Gracious!" she exclaimed, "You should have seen me back there on Route 88!"
- How long a minute is depends on which side of the bathroom door you're on.
- Once uttered, words run faster than horses.
- Bad experiences are our greatest teachers.
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